Speed Dating, Know the facts

 Speed dating has become a roaring success in the last decade.  As our society has become more time pressured so to has our time become more valuable, which has led to the opportunity to meet half a dozen new potential partners inside a short space of time a very valuable experience.

 But despite the popularity of speed dating there is a lot of misinformation and rumour which surrounds it.  Many of the old ‘hang ups’ about blind dates etc have been carried over into speed dating, but these hang ups are often false and misleading.

 Facts about speed dating

 So rather than continue to spread such misinformation we thought it best to set a few facts about speed dating straight. 

• The commonly held starting point of speed dating came about in 1998 when Rabbi Yaacov Deyo introduced it in Los Angles as a way for young Jewish singles who were intent on marriage to meet.
• There is no set in stone time limit for the ‘dates’ to take place, the majority range from 3 to 10 minutes but vary significantly depending on the event.
• Despite the organization of the event (or perhaps because of it) more relationships get started in the bar afterwards when both sexes can mix freely.  So far from the traditional pot luck of who you get the dates with there are plenty of opportunities to meet anyone who catches your eye.
• Your personal information is kept safe by the host/hostess.  All the information that the other person needs to see is your name (usually on a name badge).  Telephone, email address etc are only passed on if both parties request it, or if you do so at the table together (depends on the event).
• Many people view speed dating as a throw of the dice for the desperate, but far from being the case it is often very successful individuals who take part – people who don’t have the time to take out from their lifestyles to meet people in the more traditional manner.
• Whilst it can be disregarded as superficial by some it should be viewed not as a date but as an introduction service… where you get to meet people and check to see if you would be compatible before arranging a proper date.
• There are many different types of speed dating services, which often specialize in different niches, from graduates to Christians, business owners to certain age groups.  Looking into speed dating services that work in niches you are interested could really help you meet the right people.
• The speed dating system has been translated into a number of different areas of life, including networking events for business, this is because it allows a lot of initial information to be passed in a small length of time between interested parties.

 Speed dating is a long way from the often thought of image that can be portrayed by many who haven’t tried it.  It has become extremely popular for a reason – because it works very well.

The Best Speed Dating Tips

 Speed dating can be intimidating, no question.  Whilst it is a great manner of meeting new people, and especially new partners, it works by meeting people we have never met – and to many people that can be nerve racking. 

 But it doesn’t have to be.  These are people, just like you and me, people who are in the same position and have the same fears, it is important to remember that.  But there are ways that you can go about making speed dating less scary AND make it more successful.  Follow our simple speed dating tips to know how.

 1) Prepare some questions and conversation points.  Remember why you are going to speed dating?  It is not to be liked by everyone but to find someone who is right for you, and to do that you need to get to know them.  So prepare some questions to ask to give you answers that you want – hobbies, career goals, interests, anything that is important to you.  You don;t have to ask directly, drawing the conversation around certain points can sometimes teach you more then direct questions ever could.

2) Be yourself.  Tried and sometimes trite advice but in a setting like speed dating it is essential.    You only have a small amount of time to get to know someone so it is important that you show them who you really are rather than hide behind a façade you feel more comfortable with.

3) Know what you want out of it.  Too many people go into speed dating just hoping for something to make things a bit better.  Instead look for specific goals, even if it is just to get flirting again.

4) Keep things light.  Whilst you want to know the answers to certain questions also remember it is your first meeting – getting too deep, too personal, can be off putting.  Try keep things light and natural, but on the same topics you want covered to allow yourself to read deeper into their thoughts.

5) Mimic their body language. An old interviewing technique called ‘mirroring’ works well, as speed dating has a lot of parallels with interviews.  By mirroring their body language you show that you are ‘like them’, and subconsciously people respond well to people that they think are like themselves.

6) Flirt!  Like keeping things light you need to remember this is a first meeting, so if you are interested don’t try and hide it – you may never see them again.  Instead flirt with them, make eye contact, touch their hands, use their name regularly – however you usually like to flirt, use it!

 Now obviously you can’t prepare for every situation that speed dating throws at you, because every person you meet will be different, but that is the fun!  Every person is someone that you can get to know, that could become important to your life, but at the same time you may never see them again – so make sure you enjoy it and that you are not intimidated.